IT'S IMPOSSIBLE TO DRIVE YOUR CAR OFF A MOUNTAINTOP CLIFF IF YOU'RE STUCK IN COLUMBUS, OHIO. IT'S EASY TO FORGET THAT COLUMBUS, OHIO NEVER HAD ANY MOUNTAINS.

And suppose you're haunted by this frequent reminder that you're doomed to die in a car wreck.  And it's not any ordinary run of the mill car wreck either.  But rather, you're doomed to die when the car that you're driving flies off the road and off the cliff to the bottom of the mountain.  How do you avoid dying in a car wreck when the car you're driving flies off the road and off the cliff?  Easy.  Become permanently super-glued to Columbus, Ohio to such a degree, that any sort of vacation beyond the boundaries of Columbus, Ohio is frequently defeated with enthusiasm and panache.  Try to keep in mind that Columbus, Ohio doesn't have any mountains.  To be more exact, there never were any mountains in the entire state of Ohio.  Not one.  Not ever.  It's impossible to drive off the road and off the cliff in a city that never had a single mountain in it's entire known history.  There you go.  The prophesy of death has been defeated by forces beyond your control.  The prophesy of death has been defeated.  Now you can live a long fulfilling life all to the way to the age of 100 without a care in the world.  See how easy it is to defeat an allegedly invincible prophesy of death?
And as I'm lost in thought about cars and mountains, here are some photos of Alison Sweeney.