Wednesday, January 23, 2013

A VERY SPECIAL MAYAN CHRISTMAS

I know that Mayan End Of the World on December 21, 2012 is starting to get kind of stale.  Especially since it's nearly the end of January 23, 2013 and almost January 24, 2013 with no Mayan South American Indian in sight.  However, I'm curious as to why the Mayan South American Indian Tribe chose to end the world on December 21, 2012.  Yeah, I know it's impossible for the Mayans to know anything about Christmas because they were cut off from Christianity for just about forever (Unless you're reading the Book of Mormon.  In that case, Jesus Christ visited the Mayan South American Indian Tribe too).  But seriously, why was it necessary for the Mayan South American Indian Tribe to END THE WORLD THREE DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS.  Seriously Mayans, I know there's no perfect day to end the world since everyday is an inconvenient day to end the world, but WHY END THE WORLD THREE DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS.  Seriously. 
Here the Gentle Reader and I are hanging our stockings with care in hopes of Santa Claus will soon be there.  The Gentle Reader and I set up a Christmas tree and had it decorated.  Up went the Christmas decorations for the rest of the residence.  Then up comes a giant fire breathing Mayan Death GOD, Mayan death monsters, Resurrected Mayan Indians blowing poison darts and poison spears, rivers of blood, flames of Hellfire, volcano's---Even in areas without volcano activity, Earthquakes.  Anybody who isn't Hispanic-South American, Hispanic American, Native American Indian, Hispanic European (Oh GOD, do I have to list every single friggen country just to be politically correct or can I just say the words Hispanic and Native American Indian for time constraints) being the only survivors---With anybody born Caucasian being killed on sight.  Down comes the Christmas stockings.  Down comes the Christmas tree.  Down comes the Christmas decorations.  Down comes Santa Claus.  Down goes all the Churches.  The United States Government falls and becomes a thing of the past.  Osama Bin Laden (Or somebody similar to him) becomes King of the United States of America.  And to think that the same people who crucified the Dixie Chicks for not being patriotic enough actually wanted the Mayans to destroy the world on December 21, 2012.  So it's ok to root against the United States as long as there was a couple of psychotic genocidal Mayan Death GODS, a few Mayan bug eyed monsters, the Mayan anti-European calender and anti-Christian pagan folklore involved. 
AND ALL THAT HAPPENS THREE DAYS BEFORE CHRISTMAS.  IMAGINE WHAT THE MAYAN INDIANS HAVE IN MIND FOR US WHEN CHRISTMAS ACTUALLY ARRIVES ON DECEMBER 25, 2012.  Well, we don't have to worry because the whole thing turned out to be one giant hoax.  Thank GOD for that.
And as I'm lost in thought about Mayan Death Curses, here are some photos of the following celebrities enjoying the Sundance Film Festival.
Juno Temple





 Amanda Seyfried and Juno Temple
Amanda Seyfried







Dakota Fanning







 

























Jessica Alba













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