cleveland854321: AND NOW, A BRIEF COMMERCIAL INTERRUPTION

Guy Who Smells Like Cigar Smoke: I refuse to take a shower.
Guy Who Smells Like Burnt Broccoli: I also refuse to take a shower.
Me: Hey, it's your life, but you might need to at least use deodorant once in a while.
Guy Who Smells Like Cigar Smoke: Deodorant are for losers and I'm not a loser.
Guy Who Smells Like Burnt Broccoli: Deodorant are for morons with a revolting body odor and I'm not a moron with a revolting body odor.
Me: Actually, you have a revolting body odor.
Television Commercial Salesperson: This was before using Irish Spring Soap. And this is after using Irish Spring Soap.
Guy Who Smells Like Cigar Smoke: I still smell like cigars. I still have a revolting body odor.
Guy Who Smells Like Burnt Broccoli: I still smell like burnt broccoli. I still have a revolting body odor.
Television Commercial Salesperson: Irish Spring won't remove all of the revolting body odors that is making you look like a dummy and a fool. But it's worth using Irish Spring Soap anyway even if the effort is useless and futile.
Me: Thank GOD I never smoke tobacco products. Thank GOD I never burnt broccoli.
Television Commercial Salesperson: You took a bath with Irish Spring Soap the correct way.
Me: And that's why I have a social life while the Guy Who Smells Like Cigar Smoke and the Guy Who Smells Like Burnt Broccoli is going down the tubes. Because I took the time to take a bath with Irish Spring Soap in the correct manner.
Television Commercial Salesperson: Irish Spring Soap. It's the best way to get to the green hills of Ireland.
And as I'm lost in thought in the scorching hot Summertime, here are some photos of the following individuals.

Adelaide Kane and Madelaine Petsch