NO BEER ANYWHERE AT CRYSTAL LAKE

Keep in mind that I'm not supporting the return of Prohibition against Alcohol nor am I supporting the return of the Eighteenth Amendment to the United States Constitution when I'm saying this.  But it's my belief that the Town of Crystal Lake, Whatever State This is Located In, U.S.A. should ban the sale of alcohol within the town limits.  My reason is simple.  Brainless oversexed teenagers including girls dressed in skimpy clothing buys beer.  They go to Camp Crystal Lake to get drunk.  Jason Vorhees hates seeing teenagers getting drunk so he starts chopping them up with his machete.  Jason Vorhees never chops up teenagers who are both sober and functioning as virgins.  So if alcohol is banned in the Town of Crystal Lake, Whatever State This is Located In, U.S.A. will save lots of lives.  In fact all the towns that surround the town of Crystal Lake, Whatever State This is Located in, U.S.A. should ban the sale of alcohol too in case some brainless, easy to kill teenager tries to purchase beer some other place.  Trust me when I say that the Crystal Lake High School graduation class will rise from zero to full capacity in no time.   
And as I'm lost in thought while drinking a steaming mug of coffee, here are some photos of Kristen Stewart.