ME: Did you ever see me profess love to a woman.
ME: Did you ever see a woman profess love to me?
ME: Did you ever see me go on a romantic date with a woman?
ME: Did you see me go on a date with a Romance Wrecking Tart of a Girl?
ME: So what makes me a romance wrecking jerk who cheated on his girlfriend if I never actually had a Girlfriend and I never had a Romance Wrecking Tart of a Girl?
PERSON: I don't know. If I said it, then it had to be true.
ME: Claims is only good if there's proof. Don't get me wrong, I would like to have a girlfriend. And if I ever had a girlfriend, I would never cheat on me. Do you have proof otherwise?
PERSON: Only a bunch of films you never wrote, directed, produced nor acted in that has nothing to do with the accusations that I'm making against you.
ME: Just because a film or a television show episode is upsetting doesn't mean that I'm guilty of cheating on a non-existent Girlfriend with a non-existent Romance Wrecking Tart of a Girl. You fail to provide a link between the upsetting film and television show episode and my recent behavior.
PERSON: That is true.
ME: There you go. I continue to be innocent of all charges made against me.
PERSON: Ooops, sorry about that. I screwed up and it won't happen again.
ME: I should certainly hope not.
And as I'm lost in thought while it's freezing cold outside, here are some photos of Christy Turlington.
Christy Turlington and Kate Moss
Stephanie Seymour, Cindy Crawford, Tatjana Patitz, Christy Turlington, Naomi Campbell
Clockwise from the top: Cindy Crawford, Christy Turlington, Tatjana Patitz, Linda Evangelista and Naomi Campell
Estelle Lefebure, Karen Alexander, Rachel Williams, Linda Evangelista, Tatjana Patitz and Christy Turlington
Linda Evangelista and Christy Turlington
Linda Evangelista, Christy Turlington and Meghan Douglas
Linda Evangelista, Naomi Campbell, Polly Mellen and Christy Turlington
Counter clockwise from the top: Christy Turlington, Naomi Campbell, Elaine Erwin, Linda Evangelista, Tatjana Patitz, Yasmin Gahuri, Niky Taylor, Cindy Crawford, Claudia Schiffer, Karen Alexander