Tuesday, June 21, 2016


Continuing the misadventures of Anton Yelchin, Bryce Dallas Howard and Moon Bloodgood...
The car is parked in front of Anton's mailbox made of brick and stone.  He gets out of the car without bothering to set the parking brake.
Bryce:  You forgot the parking brake again.
Anton:  Stop nagging goddamn it.
Moon:  She doesn't have to nag if you try to listen once in a while.
Anton:  You need to stop nagging too goddamn it.
Anton walked towards the mailbox made of brick and stone.  The car starts to roll down a gentle hill towards Anton who is oblivious to the moving car.  Bryce is trying to press her left foot on the brake, but she accidently pushes the accelerator peddle instead.
Bryce:  Watch out, runway car.
Anton:  Screw you and your damn practical jokes.
Anton is struck by his own car and is pinned to his mailbox made of brick and stone by his car.  Anton Yelchin dies instantly.
Bryce:  Ooops.
Moon:  Good going Bryce.  Now we're going to be late the party because you murdered Anton Yelchin.  I hope you're proud of yourself.
Bryce:  It's not my fault that I keep getting the brake peddle and the accelerator peddle mixed up. 
Moon:  It's not that hard to figure out the difference between the brake peddle and the accelerator peddle.  You need to look at the road and not at your smart phone.
Bryce:  So you keep telling me.  Oh great, I've gone for three minutes without taking a selfie.
Moon:  Forget the selfie for a bit.  We need to get rid of the Corpse.
Bryce:  What are we going to do with the Corpse?  Bury it?  Burn it?  Chop it up and feed it to the pet dog?  Shoot it out into outer space?
Moon:  I don't know.  First we need to move the damn car.  I'll shift the car to neutral and you push the car backwards.
Bryce:  Why should I push the damn car?
Moon:  Because you have more muscles.
Bryce:  Thanks for the compliment.
Moon:  Just move the damn car.
Moon shifted the Jeep Cherokee to neutral while Bryce got out of the car.  She tried to push the car away from Anton Yelchin's dead body without success.
Bryce:  The car isn't budging.  I need your help in pushing the car backwards.
Moon:  Hold on, I'll be there in a second.
Moon got out of the Jeep Cherokee and she stood alongside Bryce.  Bryce and Moon successfully pushed the car backwards.  Anton's dead body fell backwards against the metal gate.  The Jeep Cherokee rolled forwards into the front gate and Anton's dead body a second time.  A huge dent was formed into the gate to Anton's driveway leading towards his house.
Bryce:  Great, not only did we fail to separate Anton's Corpse from the car, but now the gate itself has become crime scene evidence.  We'll need to get a new gate.
Moon:  And where are we going to find a new gate at 8:00 at night?  And what are we going to tell the store that sells driveway gates connecting to the fence?  I'm sorry for the weird hours, but we just killed somebody by accident and we need to get rid of this old gate before the Police gets here.  And what are we going to do with the damaged driveway gate?
Bryce:  First we need to move the damn car again.
Moon:  Ok, here we go.
Bryce and Moon pushed the Jeep Cherokee forward and it smashed into a priceless Lamborghini Centenario lp770-4 twice before rolling forward into the front driveway gate and Anton Yelchin's dead body a third time causing an even bigger dent into the driveway gate.
Moon:  We keep causing a bigger and bigger mess.
Bryce:  We need a better plan.
Moon:  No shit Sherlock.  Understatement of the year Goddamn it.
Bryce:  Maybe we can make it look like a Middle Eastern Terrorist attack?  Or we can blame it on Terrorism Forces loyal to Kim Jung Un.
Moon:  We'll never get anybody to believe that.  We need a better plan.
Bryce:  I'm all out of ideas.
Moon:  We can't just leave and allow anybody to see this mess.  We got all this crap to get rid of.
 Moon Bloodgood, Bryce Dallas Howard, Christian Bale, Anton Yelchin, Jadagrace Gordy, Sam Worthington and Jane Alexander
 Moon Bloodgood, Bryce Dallas Howard, Christian Bale, Anton Yelchin, Director McG, Jadagrace Gordy, Sam Worthington, Producer Victor Kubicek Producer Derek Anderson and Jane Alexander

Christian Bale, Bryce Dallas Howard, Moon Bloodgood and Sam Worthington
Bryce Dallas Howard, Anton Yelchin and Moon Bloodgood

Bryce Dallas Howard and Anton Yelchin
 Moon Bloodgood and Bryce Dallas Howard

Bryce Dallas Howard

Warner Brothers' Executive Sue Kroll, Moon Bloodgood and Warner Brothers Executive Kevin McCormick
 Moon Bloodgood and Warner Brothers Executive Kevin McCormick
 Moon Bloodgood and Warner Bros. Entertainment Inc. President and COO Alan Horn

Producer Derek Anderson, actress Moon Bloodgood and producer Victor Kubicek
 Moon Bloodgood

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