THE SNAIL VERSES THE TURTLE

And they're off.  And it will take twenty years for the snail and it's rival the turtle to move beyond the starting line.  And the pace is even slower than you can imagine.  And the crowd is going wild as it's taking forever to move even so much as a micro inch.  Yes Gentle Television Viewer, it will take a full century for this race to be completed.  And we'll be reporting the two mile race between the snail verses the turtle every step of the way.  And the turtle isn't making much progress either, but it's leading the snail anyway.  Could this be the year the turtle finally defeats the snail?  Or will the snail pull out ahead of the turtle.  Hold on.  It's taking forever for the snail to roll it's eyes.  And turtle is taking forever to make a smirk.  Yes Gentle Television Viewer, the race between the snail verses the turtle will be the race that everybody will be talking about.
And as we eat popcorn as we watch snails race against turtles, here are some photos of Julianne Hough.